Listening vs Not Listening

As someone in the healthcare/social service profession, part of certain soft skills I've learnt in counseling has become part of my life without me realizing it.

For example, things like clarifying or repeating (or explore) what the other person said to show that we had understood or was listening, has become a habit for me in daily conversations or even in MSN with friends:

(names and conversation has been changed)

A: This may not be the actual one. It could be much worse.
Me: Oh... you mean this is not the actual one? How you know?
A: You are not listening.

Sigh. In fact, I am listening. I am just trying to clarify or to confirm what I had heard. I do not want to have thought of a different thing from the person I am communicating with and lead to any mis-communication. But then again, I got to also learn that to some people, when we start to ask or question what the person had just said, it might mean that we wasn't listening to them and want them to repeat again. And this shouldn't be done with friends who do not like to repeat. = ( Worse off, I think my hearing is not as good.... thats why need friends to repeat again when I couldn't catch what he/she is saying.
Sorry......

Then again.... in msn.... maybe we just need to scroll up and see again if it is in MSN.... but well,,, there can also be mistakes in typo... so asking to clarify is still better than assuming isn't it?

GOD knows.

And I'm not treating my friends as patients/clients.... just that I care for my clients like I care for my friends and not the other way round.